Why the Wall Street Protest is a Waste of Time


Pop Quiz…what are the protesters on Wall Street protesting?   Maybe it’s corporate greed, corporate welfare, no jobs, not good enough jobs, not enough wealth redistribution, low wages, or cold pizza.   And that’s really unfortunate, because what might have been a worthwhile demonstration of solidarity against corporate/government greed and corruption has instead become a completely botched gathering of misguided souls who cry the same contradictory messages…

#5.  Rich People Stink.  I Want to be Rich.

Capitalism, for all it’s positive accolades, is really about one thing…pursuing the American dream.  And that dream is to be richer than Joe next door so you can feel better about yourself as a human being.  It’s about bigger cars, bigger houses and bigger breasts.  The opposite of that is Socialism, where the government happily tells you where to go and how to get there and rewards you by giving you a home and food paid for by the state.  The former you become self-sufficient, and the latter you become a pet.

Make no mistake, there is absolutely a disconnect between the stinking rich and the common cubicle monkey.  My CEO is so lost in his own warped reality that I wouldn’t be surprised if there was a three-ring circus in the server room when I showed up tomorrow.   But despite the fact that he is a worthless, idiotic, greedy waste of protein and grease, we all have a bit of this in us.  It’s like a seed, and money makes it grow.

Take any cheesy bearded hipster protester, give him a million dollars and he would tell his friends where to go with the help of his middle finger.

#4. Don’t You People Have Jobs?

I have a hard time believing that so many young people with top of the line electric devices and designer clothes are homeless and unemployed.   Call me crazy, but I’m assuming that these folks for the most part have a home to go to and a meal waiting for them in the fridge…probably made by their mom.

Of course times are tough.  America couldn’t be more screwed if they were Lindsay Lohan.  No really.  That’s not possible.  Industry is dying and credit limits are maxed out and getting more inflated by the second.   We have outsourced our economy, but don’t have what it takes to get it back.   That’s why the bitter pill of socialism is getting easier to swallow, and if it’s one thing everyone can’t get enough of it’s “easy”.   Because when the local manufacturer moves to Korea and your home now has the resale value of a cardboard box, socialism looks like a glorious “Get out of Jail Free” card that gets hard to resist.   Like Esau, most would gladly sell their birthright for a hot bowl of soup.

#3.  Maybe Try the White House

Corporations really couldn’t give a rats glute what these people are protesting.  They’re just ticked off that parking is a nightmare and they have to bring a bag lunch to avoid the gypsy camp outside their doors armed with iPhones.   The protest is merely a nuisance.   The problems here need to be addressed from the top.   That means taking it to the President and the rest of the boot licking politicians.

I don’t know if we can get all these bonehead protesters onto a bus and ship them off to Washington, but it’s worth a try.   Maybe if we had a little more trade rules to protect local manufacturing there would be actual jobs left in America instead of EVERYTHING being made in China.  Corporations are going to outsource because the laws say they can, and they have no intention of changing that.   Unless the playing field is even, few companies can charge more for having their product “Made in America”.

#2.  Have a Point.

Shakespeare said it best when he proclaimed that “brevity is the soul of wit”.  Fortunately for Shakespeare he never foresaw the dawn of Twitter.   Twitter is without a doubt the biggest piece of time wasting techno-garbage in existence that has done more to destroy the proper use of language than Rocky Balboa at a poetry recital.  And yes…I’m on it.  But it’s kind of a necessary evil in the writing business and I’d like to think that I keep my posts rare, and relevant.   Not so…

It’s like, so like, I mean really, you know.

When protests took place over Vietnam and racial inequality the message was loud and it was damn clear.  All we have here is a million voices all trying to shout over each other and nobody can make out what the heck anyone is even trying to say.  There is no cohesion, no unifying force.  For the most part it’s…

#1. Pretty Much Over-run by Hipsters.

You wake up one day and decide to leave the embryonic sack of home to make your way in the real world.  Wait…I need a job?  An apartment?  No meals made for me?  I can’t afford the new iPhone 4S and have to settle for an $#@! ANDROID???  Screw that.

Complaining about ones raw deal in life might have a ring of truth if I didn’t see these kids tweeting on electronic toys that are more expensive than the piece of garbage 93 Dodge Shadow I commute to work in that has only one working speaker and coughs like a Welsh coal miner when starting.   Somewhere, somebody must be floating the bill that allows them to take all the time in the world to have an extended leave of absence from work and home to just hang out and carry a sign.

Ask any of then why they’re protesting and you’ll get more answers than a room of Rabbis discussing Kosher.  Usually it will be some “ironic” looking hipster dude yelling, “Screw corporate America!!”…which tells me shockingly little and doesn’t have a tangible solution.    And this reveals the truth of the protest:  This is just one big holiday for them isn’t it?

Sorry kids.  There is no light at the end of the tunnel.  No yellow brick road.  You get a crappy apartment where you live next to a man married to his cat, and work your way up to the deep fryer at Denny’s.  Maybe you’ll get a degree and move up to a respectable job where you spend 9 hours a day incarcerated in a padded cell and the boss is some buzzed Prozac popping guy in a suit from Wal-Mart who tells you that if you want to advance in your job, you might want to consider learning golf.  And that my friends, would be considered making it.

There are a lot of injustices in life worth protesting over.   Child prostitution.  Racism.  Religious intolerance.  Ethnic cleansing.   But sorry, Wall Street not giving you a free ride is not among them.  If I could tweet advice to these protesters, it would be this: Get over yourselves, because despite what your parents have always told you, you’re really not even remotely special.

Now get a haircut, shave that defective excuse for a beard off your face and walk into one of those office buildings with a resume.

© 2011 – 2015, John Paul Parrot. All rights reserved.

About Author

John Paul Parrot ( aka. The Dysfunctional Parrot ) is a disgruntled Systems Analyst who wanders the Canadian wastelands saving small villages with the power of Kung Fu.  His chair is also a little too close to the twenty year old microwave.  As you can well imagine, this has had certain side effects.

  • M. Patterson

    Campaigning against corporate greed always seems so virtuous, except that it’s entirely motivated by covetousness, in this case.  If disparity in wealth is a sin, then these people have got some iPhones to sell and some hungry Africans to feed.

  • UnprofitableServant

    Revelation 18:11-24 11 And the merchants of the earth will weep and mourn over her, for no one buys their merchandise anymore: 12 merchandise of gold and silver, precious stones and pearls, fine linen and purple, silk and scarlet, every kind of citron wood, every kind of object of ivory, every kind of object of most precious wood, bronze, iron, and marble; 13 and cinnamon and incense, fragrant oil and frankincense, wine and oil, fine flour and wheat, cattle and sheep, horses and chariots, and bodies and souls of men. 14 The fruit that your soul longed for has gone from you, and all the things which are rich and splendid have gone from you, and you shall find them no more at all. 15 The merchants of these things, who became rich by her, will stand at a distance for fear of her torment, weeping and wailing, 16 and saying, ‘Alas, alas, that great city that was clothed in fine linen, purple, and scarlet, and adorned with gold and precious stones and pearls! 17 For in one hour such great riches came to nothing.’ Every shipmaster, all who travel by ship, sailors, and as many as trade on the sea, stood at a distance 18 and cried out when they saw the smoke of her burning, saying, ‘What is like this great city?’ 19 They threw dust on their heads and cried out, weeping and wailing, and saying, ‘Alas, alas, that great city, in which all who had ships on the sea became rich by her wealth! For in one hour she is made desolate.’ 20 Rejoice over her, O heaven, and you holy apostles and prophets, for God has avenged you on her!” 21 Then a mighty angel took up a stone like a great millstone and threw it into the sea, saying, “Thus with violence the great city Babylon shall be thrown down, and shall not be found anymore. 22 The sound of harpists, musicians, flutists, and trumpeters shall not be heard in you anymore. No craftsman of any craft shall be found in you anymore, and the sound of a millstone shall not be heard in you anymore. 23 The light of a lamp shall not shine in you anymore, and the voice of bridegroom and bride shall not be heard in you anymore. For your merchants were the great men of the earth, for by your sorcery all the nations were deceived. 24 And in her was found the blood of prophets and saints, and of all who were slain on the earth.”

    • Again…perhaps this is talking about America.  Perhaps not.  :)   I know we go back and forth on this and that’s ok!  I appreciate the difference of views.

      In terms of eschatology, I have the take that America is just not a player.   Only Americans think America must be because that’s generally how Americans think of themselves ( from a Canadian view here! ).  Fact is America is not the centre of the world and in terms of history is a flash in the pan.  Certainly not long enough to be anywhere close to being “drunk on the blood of the saints”.

      The US monetary system ( which is in China’s back pocket anyway ) will in all probability collapse and the US will have to rebuild from the ashes.  It’s happened before and is destined to happen again because that’s the ultimate fate of any fiat currency.  But it does not necessarily mean the end of the world.  Only the end of Americans “world”.

      But again, I could be totally wrong.  It has been known to happen!

      • Danny Ray Milligan

        DP, I know this post is two years old, but I just now came across it, and it’s new to me, lol, so I’m going to toss my 2 cents in.

        I think that the hermeneutic that places the USA as the Babylon of Revelations is correct, to be honest with you. When you look through the Revelation, there is nothing there that one could point to and definitively say “they are describing the USA, there”. Now, why is this? Is the God who showed these things to John unaware of the existence of the most powerful nation that ever came into being? I find that highly unlikely. Now, it’s entirely possible that the USA will follow the rest of the world in worshiping the Beast, and plays no other significant role in end-times events. However, look at what is said about Babylon: the merchants of the world weep at her destruction, in the space of an hour. We don’t know if it’s literally an hour (nuclear holocaust? solar EMP burst that destroys all electronics and throws the USA back 200 years? -meh) or if that “space of an hour” thing is just supposed to describe an incredibly swift fall. Regardless, if the US suddenly ceased to exist as the PRIMARY consumer of world goods, whether by some unknown disaster or our economy collapsing, what would that do to the world economy? Sure, the ragheads would dance in the streets of Cairo, Tehran and Palestine, proclaiming Allah’s justice on the “great Satan”, but the rest of the world would be quite unhappy, because the truth is: Americans buy more than most of the rest of the world, combined. If 80% of your income depended upon ONE customer, and that customer suddenly went *poof*, you’re in a world of hurt. If the rest of the earth had the wherewithal to buy your goods, they’d already be doing it, so you just lost 80% of your business, with no alternate replacement in sight. To be honest with you, the USA deserves it, too. We were founded as one nation, under God, and yet no nation has wandered farther from that precept than we have. We are Sodom and Gomorrah, and we deserve to burn… sadly, I don’t believe there will be an angel sent to guide the faithful out from the destruction, as with Lot’s family. Those of us in the US who are loyal to God must go down with the ship…