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FITNESS ZONE

REVIEW: Jillian Michaels Yoga Meltdown

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The ever growing library of Jillian Michaels continues to provide affordable access for the entry level fitness enthusiast.  This time yours truly looks at Yoga Meltdown, a single DVD that promises to give you Chernobyl levels of fitness benefits minus the deadly fallout.  Hot dang, how could I resist?

I was hoping to write this sooner, but your old friend the DP has been a bit busy as of late trying to keep up with the latest in fitness videos.  I’ve also been drafted into maintaining 30 beehives for an injured family member.  Yes, in addition to fitness reviewer and writer, it would seem I’m now also a buzz rancher.

dp_bees
If you wish upon a star to be popular with the ladies, it helps to be specific.

What you get:

I was able to acquire the DVD at Wal-Mart in the fitness section.  I also suggest while you’re there to pick up some light-bulbs, a new shirt and possibly some fresh gourmet coffee that is not Folgers.  You deserve it.

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Just stay away from the discount cottage cheese unless you want to see it twice.

Yoga Meltdown 1

Time: 35 minutes

There’s a heavy amount of upward/downward dogs and warrior postures.  However, there is not a tremendous amount of variety.  The workout ends with 5 minutes of ground work that focuses on the hamstrings and glutes.  Level One is fairly straight forward and should not pose a problem for a beginner.

Where postures differ from other yoga videos is that they move fast and incorporate pulses to add resistance motion.  So while it’s not necessarily a relaxing thirty minutes, it does allow for some cardio work.  The music matches the mood too as it’s a faster beat and not the calm tones of something like P90X.

The set is quite nice for a discount workout and Jillian is easy to follow along with.  Her two demonstrators manage to avoid falling into dopey-smiles territory and are quite competent at their tasks.

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Throw in a timer bar and about 5 million post-workout Shakeology ads and this set could match one from Beachbody.

Yoga Meltdown 2

Time: 30 minutes

Regular yoga with the added bonus of balance postures and some advanced moves.  Some postures near the end attempt to fold you in half like you were being stuffed in a box by the Russian mafia.  So things go from beginner to advanced in fairly short order.  Know your own limits to avoid hospitalization.

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Half of you slipped a disc just looking at this image.

This faster paced cardio-yoga has its definite downsides.  Instead of slowly moving and adjusting to deeper postures, Jillian instead opts to get a cardio burn.  The tradeoff might make the beginner more prone to injury if they don’t back off.

CONCLUSION

Jillian is one of the leaders when it comes to highly affordable workout DVD’s that don’t suck.  She doesn’t come off as a bubbly idiot or merely a pretty face for the camera, although she has a demeanor that for some reason reminds me of a female Rocky Balboa.  She has skills and good communication, which is evident given her popularity.  However, like many trainers she will either motivate or irritate you.  For me it was a little of both as she talks a lot for a workout I generally associate with calm relaxation.

Trying to measure the level of difficulty really depends on who you are.  Are you brand new to yoga?  This would be a good way to break in…as long as you don’t go all nuts with the complex moves at the end of the second workout.  Are you a P90X ( or similar ) grad or have had past experience with yoga?  This will bore you to tears with how easy it is most of the time.

There are some things to keep in perspective.  If you think you’re going to get a revolutionary new type of yoga that is inspired as a DaVinci painting, then you expect a lot for ten dollars.  Lower those expectations to the level of say, Bob Ross and you’ll be more on par with this offering.

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Just enjoy your happy trees.

Still, you get better value for $10 than you will with many other programs.  Some higher priced video packages serve to be little more than comic relief so you should be able to avoid buyers remorse with most any Jillian Michaels purchase.

I do have a critical eye when it comes to marketing however.  The packaging embellishes a little to say the least. Lose mega-calories…really?  Mega you say?   And losing 5 pounds a week is highly dubious unless you maintain Olympic levels of strictness in your food regiment or have significant water weight.  If you’re already reasonably fit, I suggest dismissing such claims and simply enjoying the ride.

If we allow ourselves to come back to Earth with realistic expectations, this will work core strength and enhance your overall flexibility.  This is what one should expect from Yoga Meltdown.  But if you choose to use this as your sole fitness regimen, those “mega”-calories will not burn as fast as you might be led to believe.

3feathers

3 Feathers out of 5

John Paul Parrot ( aka. The Dysfunctional Parrot ) is a disgruntled Systems Analyst who wanders the Canadian wastelands saving small villages with the power of Kung Fu.  His chair is also a little too close to the twenty year old microwave.  As you can well imagine, this has had certain side effects.

10 Comments

10 Comments

  1. Andrew Coyle

    May 25, 2016 at

    To stick with the Yoga theme, would you review Jake Ferree’s YO:30 on Xbox Fitness?
    I think it’s a great intro to Yoga, and has plenty of advanced techniques. Would love to hear your take on it.

    • Dysfunctional Parrot

      May 25, 2016 at

      I don’t actually own a game console so I’m afraid I won’t be able to do that one. I am reviewing Ultimate Yogi right now so hopefully I can get something posted within the next week or so.

  2. holyguy7

    June 13, 2015 at

    The BEST yoga workouts I have every seen BAR NONE is “The Ultimate Yogi”. I picked up the series on ebay for $50 and have not gone a week without doing at least one of these workouts.

    Check it out:

    http://www.theultimateyogi.com/

  3. Jason Rothwell

    June 5, 2015 at

    Dysfunctional Parrot, I would love to read your take on Bas Rutten’s MMA Workout. You can find it on Amazon for about $50.

    • Dysfunctional Parrot

      June 5, 2015 at

      His website is certainly…interesting. Especially the option to buy “Bas Rutten Saves Christmas”. There’s a guy with creativity right there!

      • Jason Rothwell

        June 9, 2015 at

        I first heard of Bas Rutten’s MMA workout on the Sherdog forums and I picked it up based on their positive reviews. It is a video with four audio CDs that you follow along with and is one of the most intense upper body conditioning workouts I have ever done. I have read your less than enthusiastic take on some of the “MMA” training programs out there so I wanted to read your amusing and insightful no BS review :)

  4. Carlos Ortega

    June 2, 2015 at

    Dysfunctional Parrot! Thanks for all you do! Your reviews are great. I have now done T25, p90x3, and just got Ruthless. Future plans inspired by your reviews include Insanity Asylum, P90X2, and BodyBeast.

    I’ve just seen a new offering out there that I would love to read your review of. BODYSHRED by Jillian Michaels. It looks to me like it’s her attempt to go more upmarket, more expensive, and more extreme, to more directly address her competitors like Tony Horton and Shaun T.

    I saw a bit of an infomercial and read the website (getbodyshred.com the “what you get” section). It looks intense and makes some bold claims to be at the cutting edge of fitness science. From what I saw, I thought, yes, I should add this to my to do list. But I would love to get your take on it first.
    Is it really on the Shaun T/Tony H level in terms of intensity, production values, results? Is it really something new and cutting edge, or is it just the same Jillian Michaels stuff at an inflated price? Or is it different? Really different or same but just more intense? Is it too intense? Will it injure me? Is it truly varied, like P90X3, or is it more like Insanity–repetitive but intense? Etc. etc.

    • Dysfunctional Parrot

      June 2, 2015 at

      So many questions that I feel compelled to answer! I will put Bodyshred on my short list as I’m trying to add some non-Beachbody reviews to the mix.

      • zubalove

        July 16, 2015 at

        You really are a lone voice in the wilderness when it comes to these reviews. Honestly, you’re the only reviewer I can think of that can be relied on for honesty. I just wish you weren’t so serious all the time.

        You should have a paypal tip cup on the site. You deserve it.

        • Dysfunctional Parrot

          July 19, 2015 at

          Thanks for the kind words! I’ve toyed with the idea of a “tip jar” but wasn’t sure how to tastefully implement it. Sure would help pay for these programs!

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